After spending a relatively quiet long weekend. I spent some reflective time watching meaningful movies and such. I watched "And the Band Played On" once again. I wanted to really look at the gridlock those who fought to treat and cure AIDS had to go through. I grew up in a time where their were bath houses and a YMCA I didn't understand what they were or had become until much later.
I found it painful to see those lost in the ego fighting and denial of what was an epidemic. I remember hearing some large and in charge folks saying things that hurt my heart. I thought that a disease was just that a disease and working towards a cure should be everybody goals.., but until it spread out among the straight, the sickly and those with a voice that could not be silenced, the media, those in charge, just ignored, ignored all those people dying and withering away. As a Vogue subscriber and fashionista before the word, I knew every designer and photog, when they started mystery dying, I'm scrolling through my magazine every other month, he died, they died. Where was the compassion, the concern, the care? I waiting for the news announcement that something was wrong, it came late, too late for so many, where was the love?
I watched the community gather up and take care of themselves and fight and fight for treatment and a cure. Where has our compassion as a group of people gone? Why is their so much hatred? Why does everyone suddenly feel they are the judge no need for a jury, I am ALL, everyone else and their feelings no longer matter. That is no Christianity I know or have read about. Would it not be better to love each and other and live, and be the change we want to see. I can't worry about what everybody is doing if I have things in my life that need work. I feel like an Isley brother song " I've got work to do" and the only person I need to work on is me, my straight life has enough action and adventure and I'm trying to stay on my path and I can't be watching how you stepping, lest I trip and fall myself.
IT WAS A GOOD WEEKEND
This was a good weekend, summer fun fest, bbq cook out and games for all, the only thing missing was ...you know, but as long as I avoid sad songs and sappy movies, I should be okay, my legs hurt, my accupressure gal says it's cause I'm worried about a man, could be, yea it is. It's been a while. Meanwhile back at the ranch I'm resisting temptation to call an ex, or get involved with the next. I'm giving me some me time, trying create a new career for me, that pays well, I'm good at what I do and somewhere somebody will pay me well for it, then I can get some new digs to live in and watch my babies grow well. So I've outlined my goals and other than a good dye job to my hair and keep exercising to avoid the broken heart= fatty food syndrome, I plan to meditate with God, and do what I always do..keep movin.
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