Life

OKAY I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A TENNESSE WILLIAMS PLAY, RELYING ON THE KINDNESS OF OTHERS. THIS HOLIDAY SEASON IS HARD, ME AND THE KIDS LIVE APART, I WAS BLESSED TO HAVE A FRIEND BUY THEM SOME GIFTS. THERE DAD MY EX IS STILL IN THE HOSPITAL,BETTER, BUT HE'S NOT WORRIED ABOUT THEM HAVING CHRISTMAS, IT'S STILL ABOUT HIM. MY OLDEST IS JUST FIGURING OUT HE'S NOT A CUTE KID BUT A 19 YEAR OLD YOUNG MAN SO HE'S NOT ON THE GIFT LIST. MEANWHILE, MY PHONE KEEPS RINGING WITH OFFERS OF BOOTY CALLS, WTF. MY BELOVED REMEMBERED MY BDAY A WEEK LATER, WHICH ONLY TELLS ME THAT'S IT'S TIME TO KEEP IT MOVIN. I'M TRYING TO STAY UP AND POSITIVE FOCUSED, IT'S HARD, NEW YEAR'S IS AROUND THE CORNER AND WHERE'S MY DATE...UGH! THE UPSIDE IS THINGS COULD ALWAYS BE WORST....

Thanks to God, I saw another birthday, it was quiet,I spent it ball room dance practicing at the karate school. My oldest always tells me first, then my almost baby girl, his best bud called me, I got some nice calls, however missing from my b-day list was The one I love and the one I used to love...funny, but actually the one I love and whose call, card etc. I waited for never came, it answered a burning question. Time to move on, I realized that If you want me, you'd make the time, take the time to be together. Odd thing is that I'm not mad, or to sad, just moving on. Besides there's a young man who has been talking to me and would like the chance to get to know me better, perhaps now is the time. I plan to expand my horizons and date again, there are alot of young men not babies who like a mature woman.

Okay I'm trying to stay up and focused, but...but...anyhoo, I'm sitting here at the dojo desk, and Michael Henderson "Take Me I'm Yours" and thinking about happier times. My Love is in the Yellow Rose State and here I am still in the struggle for survival. Trying to get a date for New Year's Eve, nothing heavy, just a dance buddy and someone to talk with the evening, that keeps the oldies far, far away from me.